The "letting go" is just a natural happening in one who is mature. If I'm clear that my highest value is the basic well being of my children, it will also be understood that inherent in that, is a promise/intent to materially provide for my children, to keep a roof over their heads, food in their bellies, provisions for recreation/education, hobbies, peer relationships, etc,.... all the stuff I should value on behalf of my children, if I'm a basically decent parent.
The more clear and mature one is, the less thought necessary...the more 'natural' that gravitation towards the action that serves my highest value, without the need to actively 'let go of' the conflicting value/interest.
When you are wholly clear that your highest value is the well being of your children, to be a supportive, nurturing parent, in all ways, desires that compete/interfere with that do not need to be denied or suppressed at all....rather, they naturally take a back-seat to the impetus that supports the value that trumps them.
Wow. this says much. It's not an 'odd thing' at all. And no, one does not need to suppress a desire that is actually valued less than another. That which is valued most highly sets the stage for the strongest arising impetus to action.
A parent who truly has their child's well-being at the top of their list of values, is not going to struggle or need to suppress a desire to sleep in, relax everyday, avoid 'work.'
It is only one who expects experiential content to perfectly match up in every moment with his surfacey desire for immediate pleasure who struggles with the kind of commitment you describe. Your stance on this is extremely childish. I don't like work so I'm gonna center my entire life and lifestyle around avoiding that.
I didn't particularly feel like getting out of bed this morn to get my kids ready for school. It would have been 'nice' to stay under my warm covers, to wake up slowly or catch a few more z's, but my overriding values regarding my kids had me easily pushing past that desire for a moment of surfacey pleasure.
No. Everything you describe, hinges upon the presence of 'the illusionary separate self.'
It is the separate self who thinks he needs to experience surfacey pleasures in every waking moment...whose top value is to have arising experiential content perfectly match up with his shallow wants/preferences so that he can feel good.
Your insistence that every moment should conform to suit your surfacey desire for pleasure, very much indicates the presence of your sense of being a separate self.
Believe it or not Andrew, it's really not that big of a deal if in a given moment, life circumstance is not conforming perfectly to surfacey wants/preferences....the important thing is that the highest values get addressed...and sometimes that means that in a given moment, a bit of resistance might enter in. So long as the big picture remains in focus, (that fundamentally all is perfect, regardless of surface appearance,) it's not a big deal.
It's only an extremely immature, self-identified person who can't bear to be uncomfy for one moment in time.....whose highest value is to avoid all discomfort, all sense of resistance, all of that which does not serve my desire for present moment surface pleasure.
Everything I see you doing/living right now, has a deep aversion/fear of momentary discomfort at it's basis. Your lifestyle is predicated upon fear, which is so very different than one having a vision of what they desire, and allowing that vision to call them forward. There are times when allowing a vision for what is wanted to call you forward, where you may indeed at times find yourself having to push through a bit of resistance, but if your highest value truly is to see that vision manifest, the resistance will be very minor.
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